Friday, March 29, 2013

我的日记


几个星期前,我突然新血来潮想要写日记。
我上一次写是在2010年,我去爱尔兰之前。
看回去以前发生的所有开心与不开心的事,
觉得长大了之后真的很烦。

我的却写不到新的一页,三年了,
很多东西,都不是笔墨所能形容。
记载是可以。可是那么深刻,那么可贵的回忆。
一切已经成为了梦幻泡影。

其实挺后悔在爱尔兰的时候没有写过日记。
那么珍贵的回忆,其实很怕会忘记。
我觉得如果忘记了就好象掉了钱,找不到一样。
心里面百般不是滋味。

为什么说长大之后会烦呢。
因为长大之后要解决的事情多了。
身边的人也开始变了,信不过了。
生活圈子里面人人都是自我保护,很现实。

唯一能信的就是日记。日记是我最好的朋友。
这句话我三年级开始写日记到现在我都是这么觉得。
就算是身边最亲的人,都不能尽诉心事。
只能写在日记里,自己看。

它就像是一枚镜子,反映出以前的情景,心情。
常常看日记时我都有一种莫名的感动。

我妈的皮肤病药还有一个星期就吃完了。
今天她告诉我,原来他们在马场做工很多人都试过皮肤病。
可能是因为长期接触动物的关系。
希望只是很轻微的皮肤病吧。

Friday, March 22, 2013

Seriously


I don't know what happened to my mom.
She's having this some kinda skin allergy thingy.
For weeks.

It's getting worse already.
I asked her to go to the skin specialist.
But she said she has no money to go for a doctor.
Because he didn't pay enough money for her this month.

I dunno, life's sucks.
I was searching on-line, what could cause a minor skin allergy to spread until  the whole body.

There's many causes and I saw the most terrifying word, cancer.
I'm a little worried. 
She's going for the skin specialist 2mrw anyway.
I hope it's just a minor infection or sth.

I couldn't even think of a person that could help us,
if there's really sth happened to her.

Ah... come on, be positive.

Friday, March 15, 2013

对不起,我爱你。

有时候,人
明知道不可为而为之。

虽说,不入虎穴,焉得虎子。
可是有没有想过要那“虎子”来干什么的。
“虎子”对我有什么好?
我捉了“虎子”,“虎子”开心吗?

可是往往都是养“虎”为患的结局。
反被它咬死。

对不起,“虎子”。
我爱你。

还有,
对不起,陈娉琪。

Friday, March 8, 2013

Alone

Seriously I wan this to end.

I don't deserve anyone's love any more.

Love is shit. I don't trust, I don't believe, I don't dare to love any more.

No point wasting time on me.


I'm sucks.

I'm so weak on the inside.

I don't think I will feel better with someone there with me.

I felt terrible.

I hoped to be alone.

I wanna be a loner.

Let me take care of everything on my own.


The main reason is that, I can't take it anymore.

I can't take the risk of getting hurt.

The safest way is to be on my own.

The only person that I can trust, is myself.

The only person that I can love, is myself.

No one can break this strong barrier, so strong that even the one that created it could not break through.

So sad.

So unfortunate.